I Tasted Pee!

But not on purpose.

And only once.

I was in the back yard with my step brother Chad. We decided that it was time to take a pee. I don't know why little dudes like to pee together, they just do. Often times they will pick the same target to destroy.

You know, when you're a young boy, you can pee a million miles. You've got a small weenie with a small pee hole and a super elastic strong squeezer muscle. We used to have pee contests to see who could pee the farthest or highest. I'm not fucking kidding you, the dudes all know this, but I could pee like fifty stories into the air. We used to shoot ducks out of the sky with our pee. I remember when I could point my weenie straight down at the ground and pee as hard as I could and I kid you not, I could launch myself ten feet in the air with my jet powered pee stream. I even drilled a tunnel through a wall ten feet thick with just my pee stream! One time, I swear to Jesus, I sliced a bowling ball clean in half. LASER PEE I'M TELLING YOU!!

That all changed when I hit puberty and I grew a penis the size of a Pringles can. Sure It's impressive to behold, but I can't even pee above my head anymore. DAMN PUBERTY! DAMN BIG PEE HOLE!

Innywaaays, back to the story.

So Step Brother Chad and I are in the back yard and we decided to pee on a weed.

The mission was to destroy.

We both engaged our weapons when for some reason I thought it might be funny to threaten him with my pee stream. This was a fairly common joke. You just nudge your pee stream uncomfortably close to your friends foot. It's basically a game of chicken with pee. That's all I was doing. I swear. I had no intention to pee on my step brother.

"Ha ha fag! I'm gonna pee on your shoe!" I said. Again NEVER intending to do so.

But that little fucker thought I was serious so he just, without saying anything, no warning, no nothin', sliced me with his pee saber. The slice went from my lower chest and went in a straight diagonal line up through my neck and diagonally across my face. I was surprised so my mouth was wide open and I received about 20 drops of pee right to the back of my throat.

Pee tastes warm and salty.

The End.

That's all for now!
Don't get caught trying to slice an unflushed turd with your pee stream!
Your low pressure giant fire hose,
merkley???