If I Was One of Those Retards Who Can't Figger Out The Difference Between "YOUR" and "YOU'RE"...
If I was The Word "Misogyny" I would keep reeeeal quiet about the fact that a reeeally ugly girl TOTALLY MADE ME UP instead of pushing away the pork rinds, going to the gym and wearing a little concealer.
If I was a TV Judge, every once in a while I'd give some old lady who ran over her neighbor's sprinkler the death penalty.
If I was The Word "Figure" I would hate it when people said "Figger" but even more when they said "Fegro", although, I might let the words "Bigger", "Digger", "Vigor" and "Trigger" call me "Figga" even though I think those words are totally inferior.
If I was a TV Courtroom Bailiff, every once in a while I'd take out my billy club and club the crap out of some feeble old man if he made the judge repeat something because he couldn't hear what the judge said on account of bein super old.
If I was One of Those Retards Who Can't Fegro Out The Difference Between "YOUR" and "YOU'RE", I'd just write YER or YO instead, because then everyone would just think I was making fun of rednecks or negroes which is totally rad. Although the joke would probably be bittersweet seein's how I would probably BE a redneck or a negro. But then again, self deprecating humor is pretty popular too. However, at that point, it's not really humor anymore, it's just ignorance and while my ignorance may be funny to you, I'd just be back to living as just an ordinary retard. FUCK YOU INSENSITIVE ASSHOLES!
That's all for now!
Don't get caught imagining Paul McCartney beating the crap out of Stevie Wonder with a big white elephant tusk while screaming "DIE YOU FUCKING BLIND ASS EBONY FUCKING FUCKWAD!"
Your N.A.A.C.P Janitor Relations Chairman,