merkley???: I May Not Be God, But at Least I'm Real.: 111 Things You Should Know About Your 111??? Book

January 29, 2008

111 Things You Should Know About Your 111??? Book

Hello Great Person Who Spent $111 On 111 Naked Girls!,

Here are 111 things you should know about yourself and/or your 111??? book:

1. You are GREAT and have FANTASTIC TASTE! Here is your sideways medal --> o=

2. By Pre-Ordering your book, you have taken part in the future of publishing. High Five!

45. After some novice delays (my fault) your book is now PRINTED and REAL!

9. Your book is heavy, start lifting weights NOW!

73. Your book is bright and shiny, start picking out some nice sunglasses to wear.

74. Your book is now on a ship from Hong Kong! I like to imagine it's The Love Boat and Isaac is serving it drinks by the pool.

32. Your book will be in my San Francisco garage, right next to the motorcycle, in 3-4 weeks.

11. Your book will leave my garage and be sent to your coffee table in 3-4 weeks + 1-3 days!

19. When I said your book would be shipped on 1-11-08 I was WRONG because I'm new at this.

28. Your book taught me a few things about publishing and overseas printing in case you need tips!

98. You are a very patient customer and I want to hug you.

111. Your mom looks hot naked!

feel free to email me with any questions or jokes.

Now Amy:

Amy - SkyCam

BUY MY BOOK!

That's all for now.
Don't get caught making it all up as you go.
Your Favorite Con Artists
Simon & Scheister

FUCK FRANCINE!!:

Anonymous is a gaywad.

So obviously waiting for the books to arrive is taking up a lot of your time right now, but that doesn't mean you can drop the dreams.
My book will be a regular sea dog by the time it gets to me, having crossed the pacific twice. I hope it learns imaginative curses and sailor boy slang.

# I fondled your brother's boobs at 2:51 AM

dorkie-she is a gaywad.

**giant blink**
Yeah don't try it, only I can get it right.

Haven't been here in a while. Need to add you to the new myspace page to.

Anyway, glad to see your still up to the good shit!

# I fondled your brother's boobs at 6:36 AM

dorkie-she is a gaywad.

1. Will you post something new already?

2. Would you object to me posting my favorite Merkely??? post of the hour/day/week?

3. When I look at Amy Winehouse, I think of you. O.o

# I fondled your brother's boobs at 12:06 AM

dorkie-she is a gaywad.

http://randumleefocusst.blogspot.com/2005/12/before-i-forget-my-top-10s.html

I have been diging around on my old blogs. . . found that.

See? I have thought you were kick ass for a long time. ..

**trying her damnedest not to look like a psycho stalker**

# I fondled your brother's boobs at 5:37 AM

merkley??? is a gaywad.

i almost forgot that i used to give a shit about blogging regularly. what was i thinking?

nobody wants to read dreams -- i know i don't -- i just want to remember them which is why i write them. i remember better if i write something down.

# I fondled your brother's boobs at 9:30 AM

Anonymous is a gaywad.

i wish there were dreams to read

# I fondled your brother's boobs at 1:37 AM